Amazon Com Author Susancyoung Quotes

We've all been in the middle of a conversation and the person with whom we are speaking breaks eye contact, appears distracted, glazes over, or looks elsewhere. Their simple eye movement can quickly break down communications by making us feel ignored, dismissed, or rejected. For some, it may be accidental and unintentional, while for others, avoiding eye contact is on purpose.

As with most things in life, a healthy balance will keep us on the right path. To avoid too much eye contact or too little, seek to create a comfortable mix. It is generally encouraged to use more eye contact when you are listening and less when you are speaking.

Your direct eye contact is one of the best compliments you can give another human being. You are subliminally telling them that you are listening, they matter, and that what they have to say is important.

5 Tips for Mirroring Others1.tBody language. When they smile, you smile. When they lean back in their chair, you lean back in your chair. When they cross their legs or fold their arms, you do the same.2.tVocabulary or specific words. Notice their language and the words they choose and use—their keywords, expressions, expletives, or phrases. 3.tCommunication style. People receive, process, and deliver information in different ways. Notice whether someone is results driven or relaxed, emotional or pragmatic, talkative or observant. Recognizing their style will enable you to adapt your style to theirs to build rapport and improve communication.4.tVocal style. a.tSpeech rate—If they are talking fast, you talk fast. If they are talking slowly, you talk slowly. Consider rhythm, pace, and tempo. b.tVolume—If they are speaking quietly and softly, match their volume. c.tTone—Mirror their emotion, tone, and pitch. You can even seek to mirror their grammar and dialect, as long as it is discreet and respectful.

As we explore this valuable non-verbal language, please note that these principles do not apply in many cultures around the world. In some cultures, direct eye contact may offend, affront, violate, or threaten.

7 Ways to Improve Eye Contact at any Time1.tRelax into the moment by smiling.2.tPractice making eye contact with people you trust, so that when you are with strangers, it is easier to form a connection.3.tWhen you feel uncomfortable, begin by looking at their mouth or forehead.4.tLean in and show that you are interested and attentive.5.tPut a little space between you and the other person.6.tRemember that the other person may be feeling just as awkward.7.tDon’t give them a blank stare throughout a conversation. Rather, practice gazing down or to the side every few moments so that you appear relaxed.