Humorous Quote Quotes

After giving it some thought, I've decided to name my monkey mind Ricky Bobby. I was thinking about Latin names like Javier, but I don't want to make my jumping, distractable self sound mysterious and sexy. Ricky Bobby makes me laugh. A name like that seems silly, not strong. Just a goofy little thing that doesn't know what to do with its hands, likes to go fast, and loves tiny, infant, baby Jesus.

What goes up must come down. Which is why we invented Viagra, to make it stay up a little longer.

A mother’s eyes are like God; impossible to get away from, they see everything.

If Socrates was alive today he would say : I know that I know everything. That's what contemporary philosophers do.

Love is a hook; the moment a man swallows it, a woman knows she has him forever.

The easiest way to remember your future wife’s birthday is to marry her on Super Bowl Sunday.

There were pecans, there were cashews and then there was just plain nuts.