Home
Authors
Topics
Quote of the Day
Home
Authors
Topics
Quote of the Day
Home
Authors
Topics
Quote of the Day
Top 100 Quotes
Quotes by Author
Professions
Quotes by Author
Nationalities
Non Sequitur Quotes
Popular Topics
Love Quotes
Life Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Philosophy Quotes
Humor Quotes
Wisdom Quotes
God Quotes
Truth Quotes
Happiness Quotes
Hope Quotes
He had also spent a day and a half without sleep trying to start an online petition to bring back the advert for Nationwide Building Society which said Dunroamin, twice, but half the through the second day of the campaign he had realised that it was an anachronism and the internet was about fourteen years away from mass consumption, so he stopped and went to sleep.
St. John Morris
On the other side of St John’s house is a fake egg timer who can’t maintain an erection. He shares the property with a glossy beef burger called Tom, who has been painted by a seven year old magistrate in order to be entered for this year’s Miss East Lancashire competition. Next door to them is a Dundee cake with a lisp.
St. John Morris
You little prick. It's a whelk...it's a...it's a...dead whelk!
St. John Morris
There was Arctic John, a businessman from Salisbury who doesn’t hold water, Bruce Knott, a social worker from Cumberland who spends his lunch hour picking his bum, and Judith Glycerine, the reformation pig.
St. John Morris
What have you got in there you little bastard?
St. John Morris
Beetroot Cossins had moved to Kuala Lumpur where she had died of lethargy and pie.
St. John Morris
Related Topics
Comedy
Quotes
Surreal
Quotes
Satire
Quotes
Humour
Quotes