Professions Quotes

Downsizing means you're about to become the guest of honor at a going-away party.

Vice president: That's the title given to a corporate manager instead of a raise.

A secretary must think like a man act like a lady look like a girl - and work like a dog.

I'm a concert pianist. That's a pretentious way of saying I'm unemployed at the moment.

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is very important.

I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead Spenser is dead so is Milton so is Shakespeare and I'm not feeling so well myself.

By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day.

Ask a writer what he thinks about critics and the answer you get is similar to what you get when you ask a lamppost how he feels about dogs.

Professional life is like a fire hydrant. You spend all of your time putting out fires and standing your ground against the big dogs.

The celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.