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Be aware, putting on a poker face can backfire during your first impressions because it can make people uncomfortable and make you more difficult to read and harder to get to know.
Susan C.Young
Have you ever had a legitimate complaint as a customer which made you angry, upset, or frustrated? How was it “handled?" If you were dealing with an inept, uncaring, or untrained employee, they may have made matters even worse by being rude, defensive, or apathetic. Simple acknowledgment and validation of your complaint is sometimes all that is needed. Without it, you're left frustrated or upset.
Susan C.Young
Add a fresh twist of creativity to make a stellar impression which people won’t soon forget. Granted, your venue will determine how far you can stretch and how creative you can be. Making small tweaks to your conversation starters can make a memorable impact!
Susan C.Young
Employee Engagement“Employee Engagement” has become a very hot topic in recent years. The escalating statistics for disengagement are alarming. In 2015, the Gallup Polls’ “The State of the American Workforce” survey found that only 32.5 percent of the U.S. Workforce is engaged and committed where they work, and 54 percent say they would consider leaving their companies if they could receive a 20 percent raise elsewhere. Disengagement not only lowers performance, morale, and productivity, but it’s costing employers billions of dollars a year. It's a growing problem, which has many companies baffled.
Susan C.Young
Active listening is the ultimate "Golden Rule" for sensational customer service. Just as the important people in your life will feel more valued and appreciated when you actively listen, so will your customers.
Susan C.Young
To cultivate bravery and courage, change your attitude toward failure. Many successful people will tell you that if you aren’t failing, you aren’t trying—that failure is an essential precursor to achieving worthwhile endeavors. Failing (no matter how hard) is one of life’s best teachers for winning the next time.
Susan C.Young
You already know the difference between being a gracious person versus a rude one.
Susan C.Young
Sometimes it is better to refrain from engaging in conversation because making no impression is better than making a bad impression.
Susan C.Young
Being 100 percent in the moment and focusing on the person you’re with is one of the finest compliments you can offer. One of the most respectful and considerate things you can do for another is to truly be with them in the here and now.
Susan C.Young
The Art of Communication shares insights to help you communicate with a higher awareness and focused intention and meet people on their level to increase clarity and understanding.
Susan C.Young
How do you minimize the awkwardness in that moment? What are some of the conversations starters you've used to open, encourage, and support enjoyable and beneficial conversations?
Susan C.Young
UN-Impressive ‘Compliments’ . . .•tWhen compliments are used as a passive-aggressive way to manipulate others for personal gain.•tDelivering a back-handed compliment which makes others feel bad.•tDishonesty—you say it but really do not mean it.•tFalse bravado.•tManufacturing the moment for your ulterior motives.•tPandering to win affection, a vote, or approval.•tExaggerating and being over-zealous.•tBeing hypocritical.•tExpressing preferential treatment or making an unfair comparison.•tWhen it draws attention to a person’s weakness, disabilities, or shortcomings.•tWhen it is inappropriate and off-color.
Susan C.Young
How do you enter a room? How do you walk into a job interview? How do you approach a sales prospect for the first time? Accomplished leaders know that the way they make an entrance can project their confidence and set the tone for their interaction with others. Use your poise, postures, and gestures to make it grand.
Susan C.Young
Your manners are critical for both making a positive first impression and creating success in life, love, and business.
Susan C.Young
Have you ever paid notice to the full sound range of your voice? If you have ever been in a chorus or a singing group, you already know that they will separate the group based on each singer’s pitch and assign their roles accordingly. While my speaking voice has a soprano pitch, my singing voice is a lower alto.
Susan C.Young
I remember hearing years ago about a centenarian being interviewed on her birthday. She was asked, “Throughout your life, you have witnessed amazing change and innovation. The past one-hundred years have brought the inventions of the car, television, air conditioning, and microwave ovens. What is the most extraordinary change you have seen in your lifetime?” Without missing a beat, she replied, “That a teenager can say “suck” in front of their parents and get away with it!” While cultural norms may have changed with the times, being considerate of fellow human beings is not an antiquated notion; its time hasn't ended. Quite the opposite is true. In our world today, kindness and politeness are needed more than ever.
Susan C.Young
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Brag about their accomplishments in front of others:For years, I have shared that the definition of a good friend is someone who says nice things about you behind your back. And the definition of a GREAT friend is someone who says GREAT things to others in front of you. One of the kindest things a husband or wife can do for their relationships is to brag about their partner’s qualities to other people.
Susan C.Young
ASK YOURSELF: How can you utilize active listening to provide sensational customer service? How will this help resolve complaints from unhappy customers?•tGive them your full attention and listen without interruption or defensiveness.•tThank them for bringing the issue to your attention.•tTake their concerns seriously and share their sense of urgency to resolve the problem quickly.•tAsk questions and focus on what they are really saying. •tListen to their words, tone of voice, body language, and most importantly, how they feel. •tBeware of making assumptions or rushing to conclusions before you hear their concern fully.•tExplain, guide, educate, assist, and do what’s necessary to help them reach the resolution.•tTreat them with respect and empathy.When you do an amazing job of resolving an unhappy customer’s problem, you may end up impressing them more than if the problem had never occurred. You may have just earned their loyalty . . . forever!
Susan C.Young
Manners Matter. Courteous behavior is the hallmark of healthy relations and human interaction. Manners ensure you will be more respected, admired, and appreciated. Thank you!
Susan C.Young
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Make a list of positives:Whether you would like to nurture a healthy relationship or improve a toxic one, make a list of positives which you admire about the other person. Begin by identifying, acknowledging, and focusing on their good qualities. Your perspective and how you feel about the person will begin to shift. You will find it much easier to polish the gold from a perspective of gratitude and appreciation.
Susan C.Young
What are you projecting? How are you showing up? Are you aware of how your expressions are impacting your communication with others?
Susan C.Young
Presenting “Mix, Mingle & Glow” in a social context is a lovely way to describe how you can make a great first impression by taking the initiative to help other people shine. Think of the times when you have attended an event where there were a lot of people.
Susan C.Young
17 Ways to Just Be Nice“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” ―Aesop1.tBe sincere.2.tBe altruistic.3.tPractice patience.4.tInquire and engage.5.tKeep your promises.6.tOffer help to others.7.tAcknowledge others.8.tControl your behavior.9.tBe situationally aware.10.tBe polite and courteous.11.tUse considerate manners.12.tGreet people with a smile. 13.tPractice random acts of kindness.14.tShow respect for yourself and others.15.tBe complimentary and look for positives.16.tWalk in another’s shoes to understand their needs.17.tShare of yourself without expecting anything in return.
Susan C.Young
Being Nice Has Its Limitations. While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a “bitch” has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people.
Susan C.Young
ASK YOURSELF: Are you presenting yourself in the best of all lights, online and off, and demonstrating the dignity of good manners? Make sure of it! If not, it may come back to haunt you.
Susan C.Young
Get in the Game“As soon as you say something can’t be done, you will be passed by a person who is already doing it.” – Unknown“Do you typically observe the game of life from the sidelines, sit in the penalty box, play your heart out on the field, or show up when the opportunity has already passed by and ask, “What happened?”Your answer to this question will reveal a lot about your initiative. Granted, various situations call for diverse levels of interest and engagement. However, if you want to rock your relationship results, it is going to require action, effort, initiative, and choosing to get in the game.
Susan C.Young
Every one of us, at some time or another, has allowed fear to prevent us from living our best possible life. The first step in conquering our fears is to identify and confront them. Among the most common are:•tFailure•tSuccess•tBeing rejected•tLooking stupid•tFinancial insecurity•tFalling on your face•tBeing vulnerable•tAppearing weak or unhealthy•tExposing your secrets•tBeing alone or unloved•tUpsetting the status quo•tDisappointing others
Susan C.Young
Research by the Income Center for Tradeshows found that people are twice as likely to remember you if you shake hands. According to the American Management Association, it takes only one-fortieth of a second to create a human bond. Whether you shake someone’s hand, squeeze their arm, or touch their shoulder, make these moments count to be remembered favorably.
Susan C.Young
Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be a natural communicator and know exactly what, when, why, and how to speak so that your message is conveyed and received as you intend?
Susan C.Young
Smiling reduces blood pressure by lowering the stress-inducing hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol. As my mother, who is now in her eighties, navigates the challenges of aging, her mantra has become, “Keep moving and keep smiling.” She has observed the rapid decline of her friends who haven’t. She is striving to stay strong, happy, and vital; her desire to smile is helping her to live a healthier, more satisfying, and longer life.
Susan C.Young
Navigating relationships within our own culture can be challenging enough. When diverse cultures are involved, however, a huge potential for misunderstanding, disrespect, miscommunication, and intolerance is present.
Susan C.Young
ASK YOURSELF: Do you remember a gracious hostess, an engaging guest, or someone who worked the room like a honey bee in a flower garden? They would glide from one person to the next, spreading good will and cheer, being the glue that brought everyone together with ease.
Susan C.Young
Social orientation can be used to your advantage to make a great first impression; however, it can also backfire when we violate the boundaries of someone else’s personal space. Awareness of space, orientation, and proximity is a powerful tool for your relationship toolbox.
Susan C.Young
14 Ways to Become an Incredible Listener1.tBe present and provide your undivided attention.2.tSeek first to understand, then to be understood.3.tListen attentively and respond appropriately.4.tMinimize or eliminate distractions.5.tFocus your attention and energy with singleness of purpose on what the other person is saying.6.tQuiet your mind and suspend your thoughts to make room in your head to hear what is said—in the moment!7.tAsk questions and demonstrate empathy.8.tUse your body language and nonverbal cues constructively and pay attention to theirs.9.tFollow the rhythm of their speech; hear their tone.10.tRepeat and summarize what you have heard them say to confirm understanding.11.tBe open-minded and non-defensive.12.tRespond rather than react. 13.tBe respectful, calm, and positive.14.tTry to resolve conflicts, not win them.
Susan C.Young
It is unimpressive to not return what’s been borrowed. Whether you have borrowed money, folding chairs, yard tools, or a popular book, always make sure you return to another person what is rightfully theirs. Lending it to you in the first place was a gift of trust and assistance. Being slow to give back in return may be considered rude.
Susan C.Young
Being brave is not for the light-hearted. Bravery takes fortitude—the very act of bravery prevents anyone from knowing you were ever afraid in the first place.
Susan C.Young
Since we are all unique and individual, being cognizant of different personality styles will help you better recognize where others are coming from to minimize barriers, build trust, and catapult your newfound communication skills into meaningful connections. The savvy socializer knows this all.
Susan C.Young
When my son Nick was five years old, he was sitting at the kitchen bar while I prepared dinner. In typical busy mother fashion, I was multitasking—cooking, cleaning, running the laundry, answering the phone, and attempting to listen to what he had to say.
Susan C.Young
Action is the key to creating the changes needed to propel you toward your chosen outcomes and help you achieve your relationship goals. How are you allocating your time, energy, and activities to ‘activate your awesome’ and contribute to making a positive first impression?
Susan C.Young
In his book, Networking is a Contact Sport, Joe Sweeney advises that when you attend networking events, act as if it is your party and you are the host or hostess. By doing this, you will help others be at ease and demonstrate a heart of service and generosity.
Susan C.Young
When my son was a teenager, he would use the ‘poker face’ tactic when I was lecturing, nagging, or suggesting. As a parent, it was maddening because I could not read his reactions! His stoicism would sometimes deflate my efforts or make me surrender in laughter, changing the subject all together.
Susan C.Young
It is unimpressive to interrupt another person while they are talking. Interrupting someone in mid-sentence demonstrates that your focus is on yourself, not the person talking. I had a friend who used a humorous retort whenever someone would interrupt him. He would graciously, albeit sarcastically, say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to speak while you were interrupting.” It always got a laugh, yet he was cleverly letting the intruder know of his infraction without being too confrontational.
Susan C.Young
Your smile is a magnet for goodwill and positivity. In unison with your attitude, people gravitate to happy people!
Susan C.Young
Move beyond yourself to serve a greater purpose and vision. Learn to mix, mingle, and glow, thus helping others feel more comfortable, at ease, important, and connected.
Susan C.Young
Palm Reading 101•tPalm Up— Conveys openness, service, humility, and sympathy.•tPalm Down—Demonstrates authority, superiority, and control.•tPalm Vertical—Shows you are meeting on equal terms with a mutually respectful greeting.•tPalm Wet, Cold, or Clammy—Ick! The "dead fish" is creepy. Make your hands warm and dry before reaching out to touch someone, please! It can also be conveyed as being nervous or over-excited.•tPalm Perfect—This is my favorite. Better known as the "hand hug." While you are shaking hands with your right hand, place your left hand on top, wrapping both people in warmth and trust. This two-handed shake illustrates affection, caring, or concern, especially when you then reach up to grasp their arm or shoulder.
Susan C.Young
Do you ever sit back and wonder how and why other people are so successful, productive, or accomplished? What is the driver that inspires them to go for the gold, seize opportunities, and make things happen?
Susan C.Young
Benefits of Being Nice •tYou set positive karma into motion.•tWhat you give is what you get back in return.•tYou are more likable.•tPeople will treat you better.•tYou will reduce personal stress.•tYou will make friends more easily.•tYou can improve someone else’s day.•tYou will have less drama in your life.•tIt takes less energy than being otherwise.•tIt makes you a more valuable team player.•tYou create a sense of emotional safety for others.•tIt can keep you physically and psychologically safe.•tYou set a positive example for others to play nicely.•tYou will build bridges of cooperation and collaboration.•tYou will improve personal and professional interactions•tLastly, being nice feels nice!
Susan C.Young
Your handshake has the power to reveal your strength of character, make a promise, demonstrate your level of respect, exercise your etiquette, and represent your business acumen. Learning how to do it well will take you far in life and in business.
Susan C.Young
At a Chamber of Commerce networking breakfast, two of my friends and I were standing in a circle talking. A stranger approached, interrupted our little reunion, and gave each of us her card. She then began talking about herself and her business without a hint of social awareness, or care about her interruption. She even had the tactless gall to ask us for referrals. When she left our small circle, we looked at each other and laughed, “What was that?
Susan C.Young
Smiling is truly one of the most generous gifts you can give to another. You never know when your smile may inspire the sad, encourage the hopeless, heal a heart, or change someone's world for the better.
Susan C.Young
Think about the people in your life with whom you have the most engaging dialogue—the ones who will listen to you and consider your opinions regardless of the topic. They'll stop whatever they are doing to give you their full attention. They become completely present and hear you.
Susan C.Young
As Americans, we typically move full steam ahead without much regard to mindfulness or thoughtful reflection, often to one’s own detriment. Yet it is that same propensity for bold action which makes fulfilling the "American Dream" possible—where an immigrant can come to our country with nothing and achieve extraordinary things.
Susan C.Young
Your poise, postures, and gestures are the physical manifestations of your attitudes, perceptions, belief systems, self-esteem, feelings, and engagement. Be sure to know if they are working well or hindering the actualization of your potential. Being the architect for your habitual patterns of non-verbal language, you have the power to change any of it at any time.
Susan C.Young
Service Beyond Self. Value others; have a heart of service and generosity. Rise above self-interest. Ask what you can do for others, not what they can do for you.
Susan C.Young
Do you attend networking events to give out as many cards as possible or is it your intention to deliver something of value? When you are busy charging ahead with your own agenda, you're not meeting the needs of anyone but yourself—and it's obvious!
Susan C.Young
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . take the time to mine the gold.Actively seek the goodness in others then express your gratitude for it. Excavate the dirt, seek the treasure, and polish their gold to shine boldly and brightly. People will rise to your positive expectations and belief in them.
Susan C.Young
UN-Impressives of the Poor Listener•tThinking about what you should have done, could have done, or need to do. •tAllowing your emotional reactions to take over.•tInterrupting the person talking.•tReplying before you hear all the facts.•tJumping to conclusions and making assumptions.•tBeing preoccupied with what you're going to say next. •tGetting defensive or being over-eager. •tOne-upmanship—feeling the urge to compete and add something bigger, better, or more significant than what the speaker has to share.•tImposing an unsolicited opinion.•tIgnoring and changing the subject altogether.
Susan C.Young
Why Do Some People NOT Take Initiative?•tThey have a FEAR of . . . rejection, looking stupid, failing, criticism, getting out of their comfort zone, or imposing on other people.•tThey are unmotivated or uninspired.•tThey get stuck in negativity, confusion, stress, or doubt.•tThey don’t want to upset the apple cart or the status quo.•tThey are lazy, disengaged, or indifferent.•tThey have LACK of . . . energy, desire, confidence, self-esteem, skills, creativity, imagination, connections, resources, education.
Susan C.Young
Your tone of voice can be conveyed in both the words you speak and in the words you write.
Susan C.Young
9 Reasons Why Improving Your Posture is ImportantBy projecting strength and excellence in your physical presence, you will. . . 1.tLook better and feel better.2.tAppear, and be, more fit and healthy.3.tPowerfully influence your mindset.4.tAppear more confident, self-assured, and competent.5.tCarry yourself with more purpose and intention.6.tBreathe deeper and get more oxygen in your body, which will improve your energy and health.7.tReduce or prevent back pain and muscle tension.8.tImprove productivity by energizing your physiology.9.tMake a significantly more positive impression.
Susan C.Young
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