Sarcastic Quotes

It's not hard to fail...it's hard to accept you failed...but once that's out of the way, it's pretty smooth sailing

You're just a huge romantic at heart, aren't you?""If there's cash involved, I'm anything you want me to be.

Keep trying?I'd rather keep walking. I mean, whisky is whisky

Welcome to the 21st century cosmopolitan world where biased thoughts preside over unbiased deeds, simple gestures become overrated gossip materials and injustice is a part of long term justice.

Goody. That must be why they were looking for a 22-caliber anything when they came by with their search warrant this morning.''They didn't!''They did.''When?''Oddly enough, right before I upped my meds.

If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead.

Babe, I hate to break it to you, but you're one messed up mess.""I know!" I exclaimed before breaking off into a fit of laughter. "I ought to be admitted or put on some serious medication or something.

Politics to me was the whining of an old braggart too proud to admit his faults and too vain to try something new. All of their agendas and manifestos were nothing but a lucrative offer to deceive the fools and encourage the clever in deceiving more fools.

You think he left a big flashing arrow pointing to a filing cabinet labeled 'Evidence Here!'? He's a Stray, Ethan, not Wile E. Coyote!

Do you know what happens when you play a country song backwards? You get your wife back, your dog back and your job back.

Murderous thieves make their home here." She failed to keep the tremor from her voice. "Absolutely," Jonas replied."Dangerous animals too.""Without a doubt."She slanted a look toward him. "Perfect place for you."He repressed a snort. "Oh, such compliments, your highness. You're going to make me blush.

I'll never understand ninety-nine percent of humanity. - Enoch